Taking the First Step

Went to check up on my new apartment today and took my parents along for advice.

On the train journey home there was a very cute guy sitting opposite me Bit like David Tennant but with a smaller face and a bit shorter. I did on a couple of attempts to catch his eye with not much success and seem a bit difficult with parents there.

On the rare occasion that I had a "partner" I was always approached and never the other way round. So I have very little idea on how to approach someone I liked, never taken the first step in a relationship. Does it make a difference?

I have been rejected many times threw out my life so I tend to let someone make the big steps forward and I just either agree or disagree. A few missed opportunities but didn't think they were opportunities till it was too late.

Maybe that's what's wrong. You would think a string of rejections add another one it wouldn't make a difference but to me it does.

As it was very hot I wore a very tight fitting a dress and when I bent over it didn't leave much to the imagination on the top regions. But he seem to go out of his way not to look at me directly, having the folks there put him off a bit.

I am waiting for something but don't know what. Once I get going I am myself. Why can't I take that first step?

Yours
Secret Virgin

The Dark Side of Birth Control

I have recently been sent an email from Kelly Davis who has sent me a link from a website called The Health Crazies. It's a very interesting article about birth control i.e. the pill. Which marks it's 50th anniversary in the States this year.

I'm not currently on any type of birth control, thou some concerned family members of mine want me to see the Doctor about my period and think it's a good idea to go on the pill to help control it. I have naturally thought about it and still continue to do so, but have heard some bad side affects to the pill, like severe headaches and in some rare cases has been known to be a contributor to Cervical cancer.

There are many other forms of birth control including new methods an injection you get every 3 months and also an implant in the arm, which needs to be surgically removed if you want to have a baby. I like the injection idea but then I don't think I will natural without a period as it has been driven into me that no period means something bad (or good if you want to get pregnant).

Once I start having sex will obviously will have to really make a serious decision as to the right course of action as a condom isn't 100%. But then the emergency morning after pill is available and again not 100% so probably better off with a combination of birth control and protection.

Take a look and read the article about Birth Control. It's very informative wither you are on the pill or not.

The Dark Side of Birth Control: 17 Adverse Health Effects

Yours
Secret Virgin

A Little "May" Time - Part III

It's the last day of May and so comes the end (pun not intended there) of National Masturbation Month. I of course celebrated with a little me time this morning and was very good today, thou don't think I did anything different apart from it took me a little longer to get going then usual.

During my many years of virginal self love I have come across a couple of sites of great interest and based on this topic, mainly around female masturbation but some handy tips for anyone looking or seeking some pleasure alone or getting to know your partner better as well as the usual safety tips and advice that goes along with any type of intercourse.

Scarleteen

The Clitoris.com

Got a lot of ideas from this site. First place that explained masturbating standing up, which I have done a couple of times, but lie down more often. Also very informative about the female genitalia.

Yours
Secret Virgin

Condoms 'too big'?

Oh dear. Won't be going to India anytime soon.

A survey of more than 1,000 men in India has concluded that condoms made according to international sizes are too large for a majority of Indian men.

The study found that more than half of the men measured had penises that were shorter than international standards for condoms.

It has led to a call for condoms of mixed sizes to be made more widely available in India.

The two-year study was carried out by the Indian Council of Medical Research.

Over 1,200 volunteers from the length and breadth of the country had their penises measured precisely, down to the last millimetre.

The scientists even checked their sample was representative of India as a whole in terms of class, religion and urban and rural dwellers.

The conclusion of all this scientific endeavour is that about 60% of Indian men have penises which are between three and five centimetres shorter than international standards used in condom manufacture.  

BBC Report

Oh dear poor Indian women. Let's hope these men have technique and stamina. ;)


Yours
Secret Virgin

A Little "May" Time - Part II

With the stress of finding a home I let off a bit of steam.

But then I got to thinking. I have never managed to get any vaginal climaxing when masturbating. I tried twice and first off felt un-comfy and didn't go in to far and second even when aroused I still couldn't get the finale. I seem to be more of a clitoral masturbator as I get more of a feeling and relief that way.

Now as a virgin I have no way of comparing or really know what it is to have a penis inserted, but I have began wandering if when it comes down to it really enjoy it because I am not getting the stimulation or get to the finish line.

I am worried I am going to become really disappointed and then wonder why I waited so long for 3 mins of heavy breathing.

Understandably I have read a few women don't get to that stage at all. Just seems pointless.

But on the other hand I did insert my finger slightly coming to climax and did feel 'good' ish. But then again it's a waste to sit there waiting for it.

Yours
Secret Virgin

A Little "May" Time

Did you know May is the National Masturbation Month? You do now. Only found out a couple of days ago myself.

Now more widely accepted as the "norm" to masturbate regularly seems more folk are willing to experiment as much as they would with a sexual partner of some description and many people sharing them with other's. I have even read that is seen as "Real Sex" and perfectly healthy.

I have been masturbating since mid-puberty and when Sex Education was due in the classroom. I had spent many years wandering what sex is like and always had that tingling sensation but never took action on it for a long time. Till one night I grabbed a pillow and that was it. Thou seemed very shameful and embarrassed about it at the time, thou determined to prove to myself that I was sexually active and hopefully attractive.

Naturally things developed further and the pillow was dumped (Thou still have the one off when in the mood) and turned to massage. Enjoying it more and experiencing more powerful orgasm.

I have always believed that masturbation was the best way to work out what turned me on, what points worked, what position I liked. I think I have become an expert of my own sexual pleasure but of course when I actually get to do it will probably be a different experience.

Yours
Secret Virgin

Cyber-Love

For a long time now I have always thought of online dating sites as the last desperate attempt for people. Or just for those wanting to get there leg over. But recently I have been rethinking.

I know of several people who have been onto these websites or found someone threw the internet and successfully found someone to have a relationship with, some are even engaged now. But that feel of desperation still haunts me.

I was given a novel for my birthday, and in it is an example of someone desperately looking for love, tried everything including dating sites and now in the lonely hearts column in the paper and getting the most weird folks answering. Now the character is very trusting but this role, but the online dating and lonely hearts ads still carry that scar of desperation and if they really are what they say on there advert.

Now that I am moving to a new area I have been considering a dating/friend site that I found for the area. But still unsure if this will be worth meeting strange people for friendship and possibly something more if it goes well. But would make an interesting experiment and for blogging.

Problem I am not the most out going person when I meet new people for the first time. Maybe this could be a way to break that. Who knows, maybe even speed dating.

Yours
Secret Virgin