The Tasteless Chat Up!

Yes we have all had it happen at least once. Your in a bar/club/social event and some guy/girl comes up to you with a chat line they think will get your panties off faster then a hurricane can and you end up getting a line that makes you either laugh or run for the door.

Some bad chat up memories came to light this morning after reading this article from Yahoo! Dating on How to Avoid Flirting Disaster

There are questionable points on there but the point about "Watch What You Say" is the one I am interested in. And I am here today to share my experience in VERY bad chat up lines.

Two big ones come to mind immediately. Both funnily enough were while I was at University.

This one happened on a night out for my Birthday and it was just me and a few mates, me being the only single one. We are in a bar and a guy wanders up with a drink in each hand (Both were for him, he made that clear) very much on the way to being totally wasted. He then learns I am the only single and celebrating my birthday, and then tries to sign me up to the Universities Sports Association and join a club, hoping to get my number that way. I naturally am already a member of the association but the guy was so far gone he kept trying to persuade me.

This may not be a extremely bad chat up, but definitely a weird way of hooking up with someone is getting rat arsed and then try and get them to join a club that you are already a part of. Would of been a funny story if he was sober and didn't shut up.

Bad line 2 is a major OMG moment.

Again in a bar. Large middle-eastern guy walks up to me. Says I am hot, got a great figure, I do something to him ect. Of course my head is saying yeah OK that's not new mate. Anyway next thing he is going on about him and his mates are studying Dentistry at Manchester University, and they are making a film.

SV's Head: ....OK bit wierd but there could be a good explanation behind it like a promo for the department ect....

Him: "I think you would be good in it"

SV's head: ....OK getting weirder....

Him: "You're the type of girl we need"

SV's Head: ....Um.....

Him: "I think you have the 'talent' for it"

SV's Head: ......OK RED ALERT.......

Him: "It will be on the internet, what do you think? Interested?"

Me: Um let me think about it, um got to find a friend, yeah that's it, I think she went that way.
SV's Head: OK were is the nearest exit?

Seriously did he think that chat up would work?!

I don't think I will ever have someone approach me and top that little gem. I know it was a slut's and pimps fancy dress night but didn't think I looked that easy.

Keep to the basics please.

Yours
Secret Virgin