Job opening for boyfriend.

A Position has opened in London for a position of boyfriend/lover/arm candy for horny mid-twenties virgin female.

Aged between 25 and 35 and lives in the London area, you must be well presented and take care of yourself.

Must be Tall, sporty.

Min. of 5 hours per week.

Must have good sense of humor.

Enjoy going out to the pub, cinema, walk in the park, parties, nights on the sofa with wine and cheesy movie (no chick flicks like Sex and the City)

Qualifications needed: Ability to show a girl a good time.

Calm, patient and may be willing to take things slow (or fast) to deal with in-experienced lover.

Ability to vanquish spiders is a must.

Benefits: 1 Bouncy,outgoing brunette, with a fine rack to enjoy

Easy access to a football stadium

A good regular groping session

Free beer.

Previous applications which showed the following failed to pass stage one of the application process.

Do not apply if all you do is sit down on a date and explain, in detail, the reasons why Buffy the Vampire Slayer is the best thing since sliced bread, the continuity errors in Star Trek or a presentation with step by step points as to why Original Battlestar Galatica is better then Remake Battlestar Galatica. Or bore me silly in any other way on one subject.

Applicants must apply via flying pig and arrive at date in a Chippendale outfit holding a large box of chocolate fudge brownies.

Secret Virgin